Sunday, October 17, 2010

Women Are the Shiznit

Shiznit:
adj. 1) the best; 2) the greatest, in a certain category or universally.
"Women are the Shiznit."

I don't know how women do it, yet I'm one of them. I keep thinking I've gotta be the busiest mom alive but then I look around and realize a third of the women I work with are moms. Some of them have more than one child. Sometimes I still wonder if they are as busy as I am but I can't flatter myself, I'm sure they have it just as bad.

After putting in 9-10 hours at work, including a couple pumping breaks, coming home, gladly taking my daughter out of my husband's hands to give him a break and let him do the things he wants to do. I feed her a gazillion times, play with her, pet the dog, put her to bed, and give my husband attention (and doing this all on a minimum amount of sleep, mind you, because someone (I'm not going to mention any names) is waking up more in the middle of the night again) there's no time left for me. None. And I don't even cook! I do do some laundry now since we're cloth diapering, but everything else? It's forgotten.

My house is a disaster--Not that I really care. My husband does manage to straighten up from time to time (ok, more than I do, I'll admit!). But I'm just saying, if I added in all of the extra things I want to do that aren't really fun, like cooking a home made family meal a few times a week, and cleaning, I really wouldn't have time for things I really like to do like shopping, blogging, or making some hair bows for my daughter, or a new leash set for my poor neglected dog, or this thing called sleep.

On my day off I try my best not to ask my husband to do things for our daughter because I know he does it all week, and I've missed her, so I want to spend time with her. But at the end of the day, when she's finally in bed, I'm actually getting a chance to open my laptop, reply to emails, and fulfill my side jobs, but I get a guilt trip for staying up late alone. Plus, during these late night internet escapades, I'm sacrificing precious sleep to have a few moments to do this... Blog. A hobby I feel slipping away--Drowning underneath the tide of my busy schedule.

Alas, here I am. Writing away. Complaining. So no more of that.
mama and baby
But really, I'm just pondering about my life, and the business of it all. It's kind of funny. Especially when I consider much of my business at home consist of imprinting my butt cheeks into the sofa while I feed my daughter. I've tried multitasking, but after a scare with a hot glue gun and sticky baby hair, I decided it's best if I confine the multitasking while nursing to my iPhone.

I'm used to being able to do it all. Balance a gazillion things at one time. Run from one obligation to another, and collapse at the end of the day. Now, I'm passing opportunities I normally would give my right arm for, because I really and truly don't have time. I don't like saying no, but it's a word I'd had to add to my vocabulary.

I used to think if I was a superhero I'd want the ability to read minds. Now I think if I was a superhero I'd want the ability to live without sleep. How cool would that be? I'd have eight whole hours to myself (minus middle of the night feedings). I wouldn't have to feel guilty because everyone would be asleep and I could just get things done.

There'd be 3am trips to Wally World, late night vacuuming, and menu planning. Probably another job somewhere in the mix. Ah. If only I had super powers.

But really, us women. We are superheros. I don't see men doing all of the things we do. And when they attempt to do half of it they whine the whole time.

My husband? He gets a break when I'm off work. Me? I get a break at 1am. Or in this case, 10pm cause they're both already in bed.

I don't need a cape and tights to prove I'm the shiz. It's written on all over my face.

PS: Thank you SO MUCH for your encouraging words on my last post! Hubby and I are in dire need of a date... I think but no need in beating myself up about it! We went out with baby today but hopefully in the next week or so it'll be sans Lil' J.

25 comments:

  1. Oh my gosh. I totally have a new answer for next time someone asks me what superpower I'd want because being able to live with no sleep DOES sound a bit like a dream!

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  2. You are a super hero. :) It's true. I'm in awe. I got kind of tired just reading your post...

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  3. Welcome to motherhood. We're lucky we have husbands that help. Can you imagine how much harder it would be if we didn't?

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  4. I completely agree. I can't imagine trying to take care of my daughter and work at the same time. I guess it is a good thing I lost my job right before my maternity leave was up! Blessing in disguise. I just have one thing to say about the more frequent wake ups at night. We went through that same thing when Addison was right at 4 months. She went from waking up 1 time to 5 and 6 times (Lord help us) and we figured out with the help of the book Healthy Sleep Habits: Happy Child that we were keeping her up to long at night. I was keeping her awake (until 9pm) so she could see her Daddy who worked until 8pm some nights. We started putting her to bed at 7pm and BAM she started sleeping through the night and more importantly she was HAPPY all the time! She was just over tired. I just thought I should share that in the hopes that it might be able to help you with the night waking, not to mention she started taking better naps during the day too. It seemed counter intuative to me but man did it work great!

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  5. If you can fit it into the budget, I would highly suggest a cleaning woman. They are the saving grace of working moms! Our comes every other week, and I swear, I breathe so much easier knowing that although I do cleaning in between her visits, someone ELSE does the deep cleaning.

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  6. I know exactly how you feel! I work from home, so I have to STARE at my MESS ALL DAY LONG and I can't do anything about it because I am trying to fit 8 hours of work, care of my 10 week old baby, a little bit of exercise, cooking, laundry, and errands all in the impossibly small space of one day. So I find myself staying up with my husband (or by myself) until 10 or 11 pm because I want to finish something I couldn't get done, or watch a TV show, or just chill when baby goes to bed (at 7 finally!!! yay!!). But then I am hating myself at 2:00 am when she wakes up to eat and I can hardly drag myself out of my bed. And of course I am awake again at 5:30 or 6 if she wants, so my quality of sleep from 2 am on is poor, to say the least.
    Moms are superheroes, hands down. I, too, would kill to be "Insomnia, the sleepless wonder! "

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  7. I can barely keep up with life as it is. I have my first little one on the way--due in April. I better start reading up on how to acquire these superhero shiznit powers!

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  8. Hey Baby Making Mama, Thanks for stopping by so i too could find your wonderful blog. I've read a couple of posts and now i'm hooked.
    I agree with you, women are the shiznit! We have the power and the tenacity to do it all, whether we're a mom of four or of one of even of none. We women have the will and strength to achieve anything and we tend to achieve multiple things at a time, sometimes without either realizing it. I think all women who feel they aren't keeping up, should pull back and look at all the things they are doing and give themselves a hand!
    On another note, your daughter is outrageously cute and I'm sure she's going to acquire those shiznit woman powers from you as you'll make a great role model. Sure, it takes sacrificing some sleep, on average I get about 4 hours a night, but it's OK cause it's what I need to keep life from passing me by.
    Hope to see you again.
    Following you, definitely.
    Vanita
    P.S. as for the post before this about needing time with hubby, as a mom of four I can definitely relate. Wrote a post about how having kids affected hubby and I and how we fixed that. take a look when you find the time: http://www.afterbedtimeblog.com/2010/07/no-tell-motel-to-rescue.html

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  9. Your husband sounds amazing! Staying home all day with a baby is NOT easy work. I did my PhD while my daughter was small and my husband worked full time. I felt like being at work was a break - I got to talk to adults, read, write and drink coffee in peace! Heaven. I think it's really important not to fall into the trap of assuming that people who are at home with kids all day have it easy. They don't. Don't take him for granted - you're lucky to have a partner who is prepared to put his life on hold for a little while to help support your career and look after your little one.

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  10. I have really had to learn to prioritize since I had kids. And I am ruthless! I am getting really good at saying 'no' without blinking. Because I have no other choice.

    My kids are 5 1/2 and 2 and I know that this time passes so, so fast. But while it's here, I need to maintain my sanity. And so I do what has to get done (mostly - some things still get missed), and the rest has to take care of itself.

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  11. Oh, a superpower of not needing to sleep? What a great idea! I'd love several hours overnight to myself like that too. No doubt I'd miss sleeping though... I do love being under piled up blankets in my cozy bed. :)

    Thanks for finding us on Oh Baby! on blogfrog. Look forward to seeing more of your blog!

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  12. Oh Anonymous, I'm with you. I didn't say only working moms are the shiznit. I said women are. This is just my exerience. My husband is the shiznit too, and how he manages to get her to nap so much and multitask at home, I haven't a clue. Just sayin, mammas job never stops!

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  13. Your hubby does sound awesome. Wow. I agree that women are the shiznit (hilarious word by the way) even though I don't have a kid yet. LOL.

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  14. Great post!!! We are truly amazing and juggle so many hats.

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  15. I never knew how busy I would be before having my daughter. And it doesn't stop. My daughter is now 2.5 and my days are still super busy. Granted, taking the night wakings out of the mix does make me feel more human, but the nonstop motion is exhausting in its own way. Babies were made cute for a reason ;)

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  16. We are the shiz! I think if I had 8 extra hours in the day, my house wouldn't look like it does. I could actually clean and enjoy the clean before someone with small hands wakes up and touches something leaving behind little prints.

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  17. I am so thrilled to find your blog, and thank you for stopping by mangiabella! I can relate so very much to your post, I am so very tired right now, my 7 1/2 month old is teething, so he's getting up in the middle of the night, and my 2 year old is teething with her 2 yr molars - calgon take me awayyyyyy! but I know that this is just a season, not a life sentence :) and I am really trying to budget my time as wisely as possible so that I can spend time with my beloved and stay connected with him. It definitely requires being very intentional about making time for that. Thank the Lord for our parents, who are finally stepping up and watching the kids for us so we can have some date nights - we began reaping the benefits of that time together immediately! oh, if you haven't read the sleep lady's book "good night sleep tight" by kim west or google "the sleep lady" - then you MUST - it really will help get things running like clockwork and more sleep for all of you - guaranteed!!!! hope to talk more with you soon....have a glorious day sweet bella, keep shining!

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  18. Hang in there, little lady. It really does get better. My two little gals are playing independently in their rooms right now while I'm blogging. Sure, it took a bit to get here. I thought I'd lose my mind when I had a toddler and a newborn. But, the light is at the end of the tunnel. You'll get there.
    I'm rooting for you over here! (And, my house is a mess, too!)

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  19. Hello from SITS' WhinneyTribe. I get the busy thing. I work about 50+ hours a week, hubby works 60 to 70 and it's rough with a little one. What's crazier is that we've got another one on the way! We do have a cleaning lady who comes every other Tuesday and I'm in the process of looking for someone like a mother's helper to come occasionally in the late afternoon/early evening. Good luck to you, you Superheroine! :)

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  20. (Hi from WhinneyTribe)I hear you mama! I am a work at home mom, and luckily for me my boss is very understanding about a squealing baby in the background when he calls. I work ALL the time. I also take care of my son. My husband works 60+ hours a week and thus everyday I wear my mama super hero cape and take care of my son, work, home, husband, and everything else that comes my way.

    Moms are the shiznit!

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  21. UGH (most) Men just don't get the amount work that goes into to taking care of children and caring for the house!

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  22. Can you imagine doing all of that times 5 kids? LOL

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  23. UGH (most) Men just don't get the amount work that goes into to taking care of children and caring for the house!

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  24. I never knew how busy I would be before having my daughter. And it doesn't stop. My daughter is now 2.5 and my days are still super busy. Granted, taking the night wakings out of the mix does make me feel more human, but the nonstop motion is exhausting in its own way. Babies were made cute for a reason ;)

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  25. Hey Baby Making Mama, Thanks for stopping by so i too could find your wonderful blog. I've read a couple of posts and now i'm hooked.
    I agree with you, women are the shiznit! We have the power and the tenacity to do it all, whether we're a mom of four or of one of even of none. We women have the will and strength to achieve anything and we tend to achieve multiple things at a time, sometimes without either realizing it. I think all women who feel they aren't keeping up, should pull back and look at all the things they are doing and give themselves a hand!
    On another note, your daughter is outrageously cute and I'm sure she's going to acquire those shiznit woman powers from you as you'll make a great role model. Sure, it takes sacrificing some sleep, on average I get about 4 hours a night, but it's OK cause it's what I need to keep life from passing me by.
    Hope to see you again.
    Following you, definitely.
    Vanita
    P.S. as for the post before this about needing time with hubby, as a mom of four I can definitely relate. Wrote a post about how having kids affected hubby and I and how we fixed that. take a look when you find the time: http://www.afterbedtimeblog.com/2010/07/no-tell-motel-to-rescue.html

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I more than welcome your comments! I love them and am always looking for advice, encouragement, and love to read about your personal experiences! Speak your mind! And feel free to leave a link to your blog so I can learn more about you! Remember, no comment is too long :)