Friday, January 21, 2011

What you should never say to your wife (Unless you wanna die)...

Men, don't say this to your wife. Especially when she's 6 months postpartum.

"Honey--" as you grab the blubber left on her belly. Her sweet baby 'phat' "--Are you sure you're not pregnant?"

And after your wife gives you a look that could kill you, please, don't tempt her to do the real thing by backpedaling off a cliff--

"I mean, maybe just a couple of months?"

Now my question... Who's going to bail me out of jail?

33 comments:

  1. Liss@RandomJanuary 21, 2011 at 10:52 AM

    That reminded me of this YouTube clip. You'll laugh! He sings about other things you shouldn't say to your wife...

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XpFD-kgQxnI

    ReplyDelete
  2. ToriJanuary 21, 2011 at 10:55 AM

    That's when you grab some fat on him and ask "no, are you?" ;)

    ReplyDelete
  3. K. Elizabeth @ YUMMommyJanuary 21, 2011 at 11:32 AM

    We'll bail you out!

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousJanuary 21, 2011 at 11:35 AM

    Oh no he didn't!!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Feliz4lifeJanuary 21, 2011 at 11:51 AM

    ROFL I got your back! Thanks for the clip Lisa@Random too funny!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Kyla's MommyJanuary 21, 2011 at 12:32 PM

    That is way too funny!! No guy should ever, ever say that!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Allyn MarieJanuary 21, 2011 at 12:40 PM

    Definitely worth a bail out because that crime was well deserved! :)

    ReplyDelete
  8. Rocky Mountain WomanJanuary 21, 2011 at 12:43 PM

    Wow, that's either one really secure man or one really stupid one...I'm just sayin....

    ReplyDelete
  9. What I Did TodayJanuary 21, 2011 at 1:02 PM

    RUDE!! Hope he had a teasing smile on his face.

    ReplyDelete
  10. AndreaJanuary 21, 2011 at 1:20 PM

    I am reminded of the best thing I ever heard in the doctor's office.
    I was sitting in the room waiting for the doctor when I overheard the nurse asking an elderly lady her statistics and she said "Married?" And the old lady said "Yes, though you might want to put down Widowed after what he did this morning."

    I lol'd so much. Best thing ever.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Southern Mrs.January 21, 2011 at 1:28 PM

    Hilarious! Men put their foot in theirs mouths so much! We will bail you out!!!

    ReplyDelete
  12. McCammonsJanuary 21, 2011 at 1:43 PM

    Oh honey i will Soso so so so bail you out! But if my husband were to say that too, i would so be in there with you! They have no ideahow to say what they want to say, the right way without us wanting to pop them lol .

    ReplyDelete
  13. allisaJanuary 21, 2011 at 2:26 PM

    Laughing so hard it hurts!!

    ReplyDelete
  14. [ker-AND-uh]January 21, 2011 at 3:11 PM

    I was going to the bathroom and my husband walked in to give my son a bath. He then says, "where'd the toilet seat go"...because I have big thighs. Yea...he's pretty much going to die too! lol

    ReplyDelete
  15. ChantelJanuary 21, 2011 at 4:14 PM

    My husband came up behind me one day while I was doing my hair and looked at me and asked, 'Do you want lipsuction?' I elbowed him in the stomach. He got it.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Mrs. KJanuary 21, 2011 at 7:49 PM

    LMBO. I have a pretty blunt/honest husband too. I may have to start coaching him now so he doesn't say crazy stuff like that to me. I don't want to go to jail either. LOL.

    ReplyDelete
  17. ruthJanuary 21, 2011 at 8:44 PM

    rotfl!! this completely made my day. good to know he's not the only one! :)

    ReplyDelete
  18. AnonymousJanuary 21, 2011 at 9:00 PM

    I have a blog award to pass along and you immediately came to mind! :) Feel free to pick it up at http://providentmommy.blogspot.com/2011/01/versatile-blog-award.html if you want to participate :)

    ReplyDelete
  19. JessicaJanuary 21, 2011 at 9:29 PM

    the men in our lives are SO lucky we love them, and probably have no idea how close they come to death on a daily basis due to their big fat mouths lol.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Alida B.January 21, 2011 at 10:58 PM

    I have a blog award to pass along and after reading through your blog posts I really think you deserve it! :)

    Feel free to pick it up at:
    http://bowlizzlefamdizzle.blogspot.com/2011/01/versatile-blogger-award.html

    Hope you'll enjoy my blog, too!

    ReplyDelete
  21. BJanuary 21, 2011 at 11:09 PM

    Oh, girl.

    I'll bail you out. I even live in the same area, so I'd be quick to get to the jail :)

    ReplyDelete
  22. david-and-shellieJanuary 22, 2011 at 12:21 AM

    Ha ha ha!!!! Love that!

    ReplyDelete
  23. Lil Man and MommyJanuary 22, 2011 at 12:01 PM

    Ok this made me laugh, but I would for sure be giving him the stink eye. I have a "girls night out" fund jar that I am sure I can use for some bail money :).

    ReplyDelete
  24. StephanieJanuary 22, 2011 at 12:48 PM

    Oh, wow... I think, I would have ended up in jail with you! lol Unfortunately, for me, it is true though...lol Yep, four months postpartum and PREGNANT!=) Shocked, excited, and happy... We go Tuesday to find out how far along we are by ultrasound, because I was EBF and haven't had any "sign" to let me know I was fertile again! lol Your post made me realize I guess I can use that excuse now for my leftover flab...lol...because I really AM pregnant! lol Or maybe, it will make me get my butt in gear on the elliptical I bought LAST January and still hasn't been used more than a handful of times. Nah, I doubt it...sigh

    ReplyDelete
  25. Sheri B.January 23, 2011 at 12:01 AM

    Yeah I'm with you. I so would have helped bail you out of jail. Men mean well, but have an idiotic method in showing it. Do they ever really think before they speak. Don't they they know comments like that make us see red and ready to grab a knife and become lorena bobbit(okay, that was a bit much, I would never, EVER do a thing like that). I totally understand how you feel. So, here is the $ 2.02 thats in my google account. I hope it helps. LOL

    ReplyDelete
  26. SarahJanuary 23, 2011 at 11:33 AM

    Oh wow. Major foot in mouth! My hubby was reading alongside me so I guess he now knows to NEVER say that one!

    ReplyDelete
  27. AnonymousJanuary 23, 2011 at 5:26 PM

    Men... they're, well, men. They just don't get it.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Emily @ Baby DickeyJanuary 28, 2011 at 10:03 AM

    Ohhhhh hellllll no! What was he thinking?!?! Haha, I would have killed him ;)

    ReplyDelete
  29. MCNFebruary 4, 2011 at 4:35 AM

    Hahaha my hubby has said that to me a few times...I used to hold my stomach in pre-pregnancy so I also looked skinny, and since being pregnant/a mum, I have found it's a lot more comfortable to just let it all hang out...lol.

    ReplyDelete
  30. c sFebruary 25, 2011 at 12:14 PM

    Luckily my hubby would never say that to me. He has always been great even when I was pretty plump after my babies. It would make me cry, get upset, depressed-whatever. I had eating disorders a long time ago so I would feel awful-and unloved.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Emily @ Baby DickeyMay 13, 2011 at 4:51 PM

    Ohhhhh hellllll no! What was he thinking?!?! Haha, I would have killed him ;)

    ReplyDelete
  32. Kyla's MommyMay 13, 2011 at 4:51 PM

    That is way too funny!! No guy should ever, ever say that!

    ReplyDelete
  33. RachaelMay 13, 2011 at 4:51 PM

    You should make him watch this video. It might make him reconsider any gifts or comments that he makes. I just bring up the "doghouse" now and my husband gets quiet really quick. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4wTg6YB2PRA

    ReplyDelete

I more than welcome your comments! I love them and am always looking for advice, encouragement, and love to read about your personal experiences! Speak your mind! And feel free to leave a link to your blog so I can learn more about you! Remember, no comment is too long :)